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Stacey
YoAficionado

Status:
Registered: Dec 18, 2014
Posts: 3042

Sat Apr 06, 2019 10:49 pm
What is with all this Fighting and Apologies and Whatnot in the game? Are we all not adults here? Not everyone is gonna get along. Instead of calling people out why not just ignore each other? Instead of trying to ruin someone's gaming experience why not just pay attention to your own game and well chill? I know not everyone likes me in this game and I don't care... I'm not here to make anyone happy... I'm here because I enjoy this game and I have met some very wonderful people on this game! It hurts me seeing those wonderful people so down. I wish I could give them a hug and it angers me too because that means someone is out there to get them! Why?! Why must people try to bring others down? Why can't you just move on with your life if you hate someone instead of going out of your way to hurt them or get them banned? Do you really need to be that petty? I just want to see my friends happy and not going through all this! Everyone has someone out there that does not like them... it's life... you can't please everyone you know! I have people that hate me too but I just move on with my life and don't dwell on it... if I have done someone wrong I will apologize to them and hope they'll accept my apology but I will not try to ruin their gaming experience or try to get them banned for something petty... I can only hope they'll forgive and forget and move on... I am not asking for their friendship. If anyone has done me wrong I hope they would apologize to me and if they do I'll accept their apology and move on with my life... That's all...

MasLocaQueTuTia
YoAdmirer

Status:
Registered: Sep 15, 2009
Posts: 2139

Sat Apr 06, 2019 11:26 pm
I don't think anyone hates anyone in this forum. I can not imaging having that feeling toward someone or someone else toward me. What I can say, I am sure not everyone likes everyone, but that is life... I usually run away from people proclaiming that they like everyone :haha: :haha:
But most of us are adults, and as such, we agree, disagree and we apologize when we know we did wrong. Otherwise, life goes on. :thumbsup:

PS: Apologizing is such of wonderful and adult thing to do when is sincere :heart:

Stacey
YoAficionado

Status:
Registered: Dec 18, 2014
Posts: 3042

Sun Apr 07, 2019 12:46 am
MasLocaQueTuTia (121801712) wrote:I don't think anyone hates anyone in this forum. I can not imaging having that feeling toward someone or someone else toward me. What I can say, I am sure not everyone likes everyone, but that is life... I usually run away from people proclaiming that they like everyone :haha: :haha:
But most of us are adults, and as such, we agree, disagree and we apologize when we know we did wrong. Otherwise, life goes on. :thumbsup:

PS: Apologizing is such of wonderful and adult thing to do when is sincere :heart:


I never said Apologizing wasn't an adult thing but sometimes people expect too much from others for no good reason or think they're entitled to an apology for something minor... I'm not sure I'm making sense since it's past Midnight here LOL but I remember one time here in "real life" someone demanded an apology for something I didn't do (this pertains to my job) and for something that said person did instead and I being the stubborn person I am asked "Why do I need to apologize for doing my job?" and the person got upset and demanded my boss fire me which of course didn't happen since there were witnesses... Oh wait I'm rambling... sorry! Oh my goodness I need to go to bed! Sorry! :night:

MasLocaQueTuTia
YoAdmirer

Status:
Registered: Sep 15, 2009
Posts: 2139

Sun Apr 07, 2019 11:21 am
Stacey (186047797) wrote:
MasLocaQueTuTia (121801712) wrote:I don't think anyone hates anyone in this forum. I can not imaging having that feeling toward someone or someone else toward me. What I can say, I am sure not everyone likes everyone, but that is life... I usually run away from people proclaiming that they like everyone :haha: :haha:
But most of us are adults, and as such, we agree, disagree and we apologize when we know we did wrong. Otherwise, life goes on. :thumbsup:

PS: Apologizing is such of wonderful and adult thing to do when is sincere :heart:


I never said Apologizing wasn't an adult thing but sometimes people expect too much from others for no good reason or think they're entitled to an apology for something minor... I'm not sure I'm making sense since it's past Midnight here LOL but I remember one time here in "real life" someone demanded an apology for something I didn't do (this pertains to my job) and for something that said person did instead and I being the stubborn person I am asked "Why do I need to apologize for doing my job?" and the person got upset and demanded my boss fire me which of course didn't happen since there were witnesses... Oh wait I'm rambling... sorry! Oh my goodness I need to go to bed! Sorry! :night:

It was late here too, so no worries :thumbsup:
Demanding and apology is nonsense. Sorry to hear that happened to you.
I think when we say something wrong and we realize about it, the mature and right thing to do is to apologize.
I observe people, so before I jump to conclusions I make sure I know what I am talking about. If people disagree, it is fine with me. If they attack me is fine with me as well .But then if they prove me wrong, about something I have said, then with no doubt, I will apologize and mean it.

CountryDude89
YoCrazy

Status:
Registered: Mar 18, 2009
Posts: 22520

Sun Apr 07, 2019 7:23 pm
There always was, and always will be fights, on this forum. Theres so many different people and personalities, that a few heated moments are inevitable. Nothing anybody can do will help, unless this place is made Read Only(which would be a horrible idea)

Cobalt
#1 YoFiend

Status:
Registered: Oct 04, 2009
Posts: 56160

Mon Apr 08, 2019 8:37 am
Fights? In here? :shocked:

What we have are a few people who like to stir pots and a few more who have thin skin. When these groups meet up, they usually end up pulling hair.

Occasionally we do have a few heated discussions where opinions differ. And sometimes those do rise to the point of apologies being appropriate. And when they do, the adults take care of it as they should.

:thumbsup:

Moon Maiden
YoSupporter

Status:
Registered: Jan 04, 2010
Posts: 770

Mon Apr 08, 2019 12:30 pm
Anubis (126579776) wrote:Fights? In here? :shocked:

What we have are a few people who like to stir pots and a few more who have thin skin. When these groups meet up, they usually end up pulling hair.

Occasionally we do have a few heated discussions where opinions differ. And sometimes those do rise to the point of apologies being appropriate. And when they do, the adults take care of it as they should.

:thumbsup:

And stab each others eyes out with words! lol that had me rollin! And its very true! I rarely see men starting or engaging in the stabbing.

Cobalt
#1 YoFiend

Status:
Registered: Oct 04, 2009
Posts: 56160

Mon Apr 08, 2019 2:01 pm
Moon Maiden (144063105) wrote:
Anubis (126579776) wrote:Fights? In here? :shocked:

What we have are a few people who like to stir pots and a few more who have thin skin. When these groups meet up, they usually end up pulling hair.

Occasionally we do have a few heated discussions where opinions differ. And sometimes those do rise to the point of apologies being appropriate. And when they do, the adults take care of it as they should.

:thumbsup:

And stab each others eyes out with words! lol that had me rollin! And its very true! I rarely see men starting or engaging in the stabbing.

I'm glad it made you giggle. I still can't believe how riled up people get over what I consider to be dumb stuff. But alas, the stuff that gets me riled is probably viewed as dumb by others. The older I get the less riled I am about anything. People just aren't worth the energy to try to change - because they won't. Once we figure this out, it sure gets easier to tolerate the rest of the world.

:smug:

Erwyle
YoAddict

Status:
Registered: Oct 05, 2016
Posts: 19580

Mon Apr 08, 2019 3:41 pm
Making an apology, even for something as small as this game, takes guts and I think it's a good idea. It costs nothing, and it might make things better...
;)

Moon Maiden
YoSupporter

Status:
Registered: Jan 04, 2010
Posts: 770

Mon Apr 08, 2019 5:32 pm
Doctor Oozinoodle (126579776) wrote:
Moon Maiden (144063105) wrote:
Anubis (126579776) wrote:Fights? In here? :shocked:

What we have are a few people who like to stir pots and a few more who have thin skin. When these groups meet up, they usually end up pulling hair.

Occasionally we do have a few heated discussions where opinions differ. And sometimes those do rise to the point of apologies being appropriate. And when they do, the adults take care of it as they should.

:thumbsup:

And stab each others eyes out with words! lol that had me rollin! And its very true! I rarely see men starting or engaging in the stabbing.

I'm glad it made you giggle. I still can't believe how riled up people get over what I consider to be dumb stuff. But alas, the stuff that gets me riled is probably viewed as dumb by others. The older I get the less riled I am about anything. People just aren't worth the energy to try to change - because they won't. Once we figure this out, it sure gets easier to tolerate the rest of the world.

:smug:

Agreed! Although I will admit, there are a few times ive typed out words to stab someone in the eye, and deleted it instead of posting it. Not my circus, not my monkeys.

CyberPunK
YoEnthusiast

Status:
Registered: Jun 27, 2016
Posts: 8356

Mon Apr 08, 2019 6:14 pm
Doctor Oozinoodle (126579776) wrote:
Moon Maiden (144063105) wrote:
Anubis (126579776) wrote:Fights? In here? :shocked:

What we have are a few people who like to stir pots and a few more who have thin skin. When these groups meet up, they usually end up pulling hair.

Occasionally we do have a few heated discussions where opinions differ. And sometimes those do rise to the point of apologies being appropriate. And when they do, the adults take care of it as they should.

:thumbsup:

And stab each others eyes out with words! lol that had me rollin! And its very true! I rarely see men starting or engaging in the stabbing.

I'm glad it made you giggle. I still can't believe how riled up people get over what I consider to be dumb stuff. But alas, the stuff that gets me riled is probably viewed as dumb by others. The older I get the less riled I am about anything. People just aren't worth the energy to try to change - because they won't. Once we figure this out, it sure gets easier to tolerate the rest of the world.

:smug:


Oh Rod, I like you as much as the next guy but I don't think anyone owns the ultimate correct approach to everything no matter how much life skill they think they possess (I'm not saying you promote yourself as one and yet...) I'm not trying to Psychology the yadda out of you but personally, I believe parts of our character are a result of our upbringing but most importantly our past and present experiences. I don't think people fight here and take it personally because an item is blue when it should have been red, that's an understatement and condescending as to what really goes on, some of us are open about who we are and what our motives are and when you add a little bit of emotion to the ingredients anything can be taken personally if you're willing to, people make lifetime friends here not because they like the same theme, it goes way deeper than that.

During the "dark phase" i used to read some of the posts directed towards me and get really irritated and distressed in real life, then I think to myself, what the hell is your problem, this is the Internet and you never met those people before then I remember that some of them know a lot about my real-life self and that's where things get complicated when your real life and internet "life" persona is the same you take everything to heart because people who have a problem with you really do have a problem with you, not your character.

Cobalt
#1 YoFiend

Status:
Registered: Oct 04, 2009
Posts: 56160

Mon Apr 08, 2019 6:47 pm
Nick Blade (187030201) wrote:
Doctor Oozinoodle (126579776) wrote:
Moon Maiden (144063105) wrote:
Anubis (126579776) wrote:Fights? In here? :shocked:

What we have are a few people who like to stir pots and a few more who have thin skin. When these groups meet up, they usually end up pulling hair.

Occasionally we do have a few heated discussions where opinions differ. And sometimes those do rise to the point of apologies being appropriate. And when they do, the adults take care of it as they should.

:thumbsup:

And stab each others eyes out with words! lol that had me rollin! And its very true! I rarely see men starting or engaging in the stabbing.

I'm glad it made you giggle. I still can't believe how riled up people get over what I consider to be dumb stuff. But alas, the stuff that gets me riled is probably viewed as dumb by others. The older I get the less riled I am about anything. People just aren't worth the energy to try to change - because they won't. Once we figure this out, it sure gets easier to tolerate the rest of the world.

:smug:


Oh Rod, I like you as much as the next guy but I don't think anyone owns the ultimate correct approach to everything no matter how much life skill they think they possess (I'm not saying you promote yourself as one and yet...) I'm not trying to Psychology the yadda out of you but personally, I believe parts of our character are a result of our upbringing but most importantly our past and present experiences. I don't think people fight here and take it personally because an item is blue when it should have been red, that's an understatement and condescending as to what really goes on, some of us are open about who we are and what our motives are and when you add a little bit of emotion to the ingredients anything can be taken personally if you're willing to, people make lifetime friends here not because they like the same theme, it goes way deeper than that.

During the "dark phase" i used to read some of the posts directed towards me and get really irritated and distressed in real life, then I think to myself, what the hell is your problem, this is the Internet and you never met those people before then I remember that some of them know a lot about my real-life self and that's where things get complicated when your real life and internet "life" persona is the same you take everything to heart because people who have a problem with you really do have a problem with you, not your character.

Fair nuff. I try to simplify for forum consumption, but you have never been one anyone needed to simplify anything for you to absorb. As you know, every interaction is as complex as the people involved. The way we define words, their tone, and the absence of body language all work together to create friction as we communicate via written words. As we try to voice what we think and the more we feel that voice being drowned by other voices or in insensitivities real or imagined, our pride mechanisms kick in to defend our castle. These manifest in shorter posts, more inflammatory wording, and out right attacks. These things then escalate further until someone or everyone is sitting on ban island hugging it out. I've seen it a 1000 times in here.

Your "trick" about mentally dissociating internet comments from reality are a great defensive help. The offensive help on that same coin is empathy for the life of those commenting. When we seek to learn why we do not communicate effectively or why someone is escalating what we thought was a simple comment, it makes it so much easier to detach our emotional defenses and instead activate our rational learning cortex. This creates a super fast learning curve for detangling potential bombs in future threads. I can almost see a fight coming in the very first post now because I've seen the same phrases so many times. Not identical, but always similar.

And yeah, I keep my personal crap and the game from ever being lined up. I share what I choose in here, but it is fluff and always protective of the real personal stuff. I have found the web to be much more civilized when I do so.

:thumbsup:

CountryDude89
YoCrazy

Status:
Registered: Mar 18, 2009
Posts: 22520

Mon Apr 08, 2019 9:46 pm
*Fights all of you*

Image

Stacey
YoAficionado

Status:
Registered: Dec 18, 2014
Posts: 3042

Mon Apr 08, 2019 11:10 pm
I just hate to see all the fighting... I find it well, petty. But... This Forum for this game is actually better than other Forums for other games I have been a part of... there are quite a few I used to be a part of and the bullying and fighting in those Forums are Horrible! The Mods are even a part of the problem there but not here... I have noticed here they try to put a stop to things before it gets out of hand and that's why I enjoy this Forum more than the other Forums... I think I just rambled... I'm sorry

Cobalt
#1 YoFiend

Status:
Registered: Oct 04, 2009
Posts: 56160

Tue Apr 09, 2019 9:04 am
Stacey (186047797) wrote:I just hate to see all the fighting... I find it well, petty. But... This Forum for this game is actually better than other Forums for other games I have been a part of... there are quite a few I used to be a part of and the bullying and fighting in those Forums are Horrible! The Mods are even a part of the problem there but not here... I have noticed here they try to put a stop to things before it gets out of hand and that's why I enjoy this Forum more than the other Forums... I think I just rambled... I'm sorry

There is nothing wrong with strife avoidance. Many people do not enjoy forums because they always devolve into strife eventually. For some reason people like to be jerks when they can do so relatively incognito. I say this as a person who grew up trolling the web, so I know from whence I speak. I have figured out that there is much more fun to be had by leaving the petty hair pulling out of the discussions.

:)

Theresa
YoCrazy

Status:
Registered: Sep 16, 2009
Posts: 24651

Sun Apr 14, 2019 12:41 pm
.

Theresa
YoCrazy

Status:
Registered: Sep 16, 2009
Posts: 24651

Mon Apr 15, 2019 12:55 pm
.

Moon Maiden
YoSupporter

Status:
Registered: Jan 04, 2010
Posts: 770

Mon Apr 15, 2019 9:51 pm
Theresa (122233016) wrote:
MasLocaQueTuTia (121801712) wrote:I don't think anyone hates anyone in this forum. I can not imaging having that feeling toward someone or someone else toward me. What I can say, I am sure not everyone likes everyone, but that is life... I usually run away from people proclaiming that they like everyone :haha: :haha:
But most of us are adults, and as such, we agree, disagree and we apologize when we know we did wrong. Otherwise, life goes on. :thumbsup:

PS: Apologizing is such of wonderful and adult thing to do when is sincere :heart:

i disagree, i think there is a very small select few who hate each other.... well at least thats the impression i get when reading a few comments on some of the threads that got out of hand and some that got locked! there is a few who seem to jump on someones thread just to have digs. if they don't hate her why do they do it? :?:

Yep. Its childish and she craves drama. I see 2 of them here who do that

Dana
YoWild

Status:
Registered: Oct 16, 2009
Posts: 14401

Mon Apr 15, 2019 11:11 pm
Theresa (122233016) wrote:
MasLocaQueTuTia (121801712) wrote:I don't think anyone hates anyone in this forum. I can not imaging having that feeling toward someone or someone else toward me. What I can say, I am sure not everyone likes everyone, but that is life... I usually run away from people proclaiming that they like everyone :haha: :haha:
But most of us are adults, and as such, we agree, disagree and we apologize when we know we did wrong. Otherwise, life goes on. :thumbsup:

PS: Apologizing is such of wonderful and adult thing to do when is sincere :heart:

i disagree, i think there is a very small select few who hate each other.... well at least thats the impression i get when reading a few comments on some of the threads that got out of hand and some that got locked! there is a few who seem to jump on someones thread just to have digs. if they don't hate her why do they do it? :?:


:thumbsup:

MasLocaQueTuTia
YoAdmirer

Status:
Registered: Sep 15, 2009
Posts: 2139

Tue Apr 16, 2019 2:18 am
Theresa (122233016) wrote:
MasLocaQueTuTia (121801712) wrote:I don't think anyone hates anyone in this forum. I can not imaging having that feeling toward someone or someone else toward me. What I can say, I am sure not everyone likes everyone, but that is life... I usually run away from people proclaiming that they like everyone :haha: :haha:
But most of us are adults, and as such, we agree, disagree and we apologize when we know we did wrong. Otherwise, life goes on. :thumbsup:

PS: Apologizing is such of wonderful and adult thing to do when is sincere :heart:

i disagree, i think there is a very small select few who hate each other.... well at least thats the impression i get when reading a few comments on some of the threads that got out of hand and some that got locked! there is a few who seem to jump on someones thread just to have digs. if they don't hate her why do they do it? :?:


And I totally respect the fact that you disagree with me. :heart:
But I was just talking thru my point of view. I don't know who hates who (if someone does, well, too bad for them), neither I have no clue who loves who. I have read so many rude posts countless times! Countless thread got locked...I know I can be harsh sometimes, but I treat people how they treat me,or I stand for what is right. I don't play victim, neither I am one.
And when you say "if they don't hate her why do they do it? " is that a question for me? Because if it is, are your referring to an specific person? her who?
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