YoVille will NEVER ask for your password, so please be wary of malicious emails and/or forum posts that request your password, including via web links.
YoVille Community Forum

You are not logged in. Viewing as Guest

Rayleigh
YoAficionado

Status:
Registered: Jul 05, 2009
Posts: 3296

Sat Oct 24, 2020 3:00 am
Hey, just want to share what's on my mind right now.. Not feeling really well recently. Somehow i think this is the point that im on my limit of being nice. it's not like im planning to stop being nice to everyone.. but.. i don't know, i just start to feel tired for always being nice..

somehow feeling unappreciated.. just.. empty? i don't know.. i mean, im trying my best to make everyone happy, trying to help people out if i can.. but who's save me? (sorry.. something happend in game and just trigger me. it's kind of related feel in real life too). Much things also happend in real life too so it's kind of mixed feeling. Being nice without someone appreciate it is making me tired. it's not like i want something in return, i just want to feel being appreciated..

something just trigger me in games, and makes me thinks a lot too. even sometimes i consider for quitting from yoworld too recently..

i know this is just a temporary thoughts but who knows..

sorry for being whiny out of nowhere lol but.. i just want to let go what's on my mind sigh..

i hope i didn't post in wrong sections again hehe :haha: let me know if i post in the wrong thread again, and i'll remove it :heart:

Nightshade
YoSupporter

Status:
Registered: Oct 08, 2009
Posts: 556

Sat Oct 24, 2020 1:48 pm
Hey Rayleigh, you asked just the right question, who is to save you? Its you.
Image

So if you are at your limit, stay away from those who are leeching out your energy and be with people who you feel good with.

No, you aren't being whiny, perhaps just at the end of your tether :hug:
And yes, it is temporary. Perhaps just a chat with a friend and a good night's rest will bring you back to your old self. :thumbsup:

Rayleigh
YoAficionado

Status:
Registered: Jul 05, 2009
Posts: 3296

Sun Oct 25, 2020 2:12 am
Nightshade YMC (127561160) wrote:Hey Rayleigh, you asked just the right question, who is to save you? Its you.
Image

So if you are at your limit, stay away from those who are leeching out your energy and be with people who you feel good with.

No, you aren't being whiny, perhaps just at the end of your tether :hug:
And yes, it is temporary. Perhaps just a chat with a friend and a good night's rest will bring you back to your old self. :thumbsup:


Aww, thankyou so much for your kind word Miss Nightshade :hug: :heart:
My heart feels a little bit calm after reading what you said.. and yeah.. in the end, i think the only person that can save me is my self.. might be taking a while, but maybe that was the best options for now..
But still, thankyou so much for the suggestions, and you're right.. maybe i should take a step for a while and recover my self for a moment..

thankyou so much once again for your kind word Miss Nightshade, i do really appreciated what you said to me! :heart: :rose: :heart:

Denna
YoFiend

Status:
Registered: Feb 25, 2009
Posts: 17474

Sun Oct 25, 2020 5:49 pm
I can understand why you feel like this.

More you are nice, more you are unhappy if others are not nice too.

And some people keep pushing and cross the line, some of them do that just for fun...

Then you get tired of it...

Stay nice to people who deserve it, ignore the ones who love to cross the lines. That is best advice I can give you. :)

Chris
YoAficionado

Status:
Registered: Jun 28, 2016
Posts: 3442

Tue Oct 27, 2020 1:23 am
I am sorry that this happen to you miss Rayleigh, i hope i'm not in your list :haha:
Lots of book told me this : " If you're tired- rest, don't quit" :haha:
That helps me alot when i'm on my lowest so i hope this can help you too (^o^)
Get well soon! :shocked: :heart:

Rayleigh
YoAficionado

Status:
Registered: Jul 05, 2009
Posts: 3296

Tue Oct 27, 2020 9:16 am
Denna (10205906) wrote:I can understand why you feel like this.

More you are nice, more you are unhappy if others are not nice too.

And some people keep pushing and cross the line, some of them do that just for fun...

Then you get tired of it...

Stay nice to people who deserve it, ignore the ones who love to cross the lines. That is best advice I can give you. :)


Thankyou so much for the advice Denna! :hug: :rose:
I totally agree with you! I think i should start to choose between someone who deserve and who are not, to make my self feel better without feeling like this anymore.. and in the end i couldn't please everyone too right.. if i keep doing that, who knows that im the one who will get destroyed ^^".. I actually really love to help, but as the time goes by, all those thought is pop on my mind.. and yeahh.. i think i should take a break for a moment to calm my mind..
But really, thankyou once again for your advice Denna, you give me a valuable advice tho, and really appreciated it so much! :hug: :heart:



Momo05 (187032505) wrote:I am sorry that this happen to you miss Rayleigh, i hope i'm not in your list :haha:
Lots of book told me this : " If you're tired- rest, don't quit" :haha:
That helps me alot when i'm on my lowest so i hope this can help you too (^o^)
Get well soon! :shocked: :heart:


Hi there sweet Momo! :hug: :heart: Im sorry for the late reply! :sad:
Oh nonono! You're absolutely not on the list sweetie! :haha: :haha: And thankyou so much for the lovely advice too! :hug: :rose:
And yes, im taking a break for a moment right now to calm my mind, so maybe you will not see me active for few days at the wishlist thread for a while hehe..
But when im feeling better, i'll be back again, and i hope soon! :heart: Please take care of your health and have a wonderful day Momo! :hug: :heart:

Rod
#1 YoFiend

Status:
Registered: Oct 04, 2009
Posts: 55829

Tue Oct 27, 2020 11:47 am
This is the right spot for this, definitely.

Our emotions are liars. They tell us things about others that aren't true all the time. When we combine our lying emotions with our suspicious minds, we often get way out of whack with reality. This is why therapists make so much money. They help people reconcile the disconnects between their emotional lies and their incorrect assumptions and realign them with reality.

There's no doubt you are smart, kind, and gracious most of the time. Being "nice" is what we're taught at a very young age. It is often disguised as being "polite" or "gracious", and any other behavior is seen internally as rude or uncaring, because that is how we are usually trained as children. Empathetic people feel these very strongly and they can be infected the worst. There is a very healthy way to be nice. And we should do that. But there is always a limit. When people are consistently imbalanced, overly dramatic, or flat out cruel, they don't deserve your nice. Can you see how this is inconsistent with the "always be nice" we are taught as kids? This is how people get in terrible relationships.

I'm glad your system is kicking out the inconsistency both in your real world and in Yo. Now is a great time to start setting boundaries for people....and for yourself. You get to decide who to be nice to or who to allow or not allow into your peace. Don't let cruel, dramatic, and imbalanced people barge into your sanctum. They will suck your energy and tear your peace apart. It takes a while to build your walls up correctly so that you can tolerate them in spite of their uselessness. So cut them off, walk away, never look back, and find people who know how to do it right.

:thumbsup:

Rayleigh
YoAficionado

Status:
Registered: Jul 05, 2009
Posts: 3296

Tue Oct 27, 2020 12:22 pm
Ding Bat (126579776) wrote:This is the right spot for this, definitely.

Our emotions are liars. They tell us things about others that aren't true all the time. When we combine our lying emotions with our suspicious minds, we often get way out of whack with reality. This is why therapists make so much money. They help people reconcile the disconnects between their emotional lies and their incorrect assumptions and realign them with reality.

There's no doubt you are smart, kind, and gracious most of the time. Being "nice" is what we're taught at a very young age. It is often disguised as being "polite" or "gracious", and any other behavior is seen internally as rude or uncaring, because that is how we are usually trained as children. Empathetic people feel these very strongly and they can be infected the worst. There is a very healthy way to be nice. And we should do that. But there is always a limit. When people are consistently imbalanced, overly dramatic, or flat out cruel, they don't deserve your nice. Can you see how this is inconsistent with the "always be nice" we are taught as kids? This is how people get in terrible relationships.

I'm glad your system is kicking out the inconsistency both in your real world and in Yo. Now is a great time to start setting boundaries for people....and for yourself. You get to decide who to be nice to or who to allow or not allow into your peace. Don't let cruel, dramatic, and imbalanced people barge into your sanctum. They will suck your energy and tear your peace apart. It takes a while to build your walls up correctly so that you can tolerate them in spite of their uselessness. So cut them off, walk away, never look back, and find people who know how to do it right.

:thumbsup:


Yes Rod, i think it's about the time to learn to cut people off.. im the type that don't want to let down people, and the one feels guilty if someone is not happy with my decisions.. but i think now is the time to being a bit more care and appreciated my own self rather than other people first... i know something new is hard to learn, but i'll try my best ^^". Also i would like to say thankyou for your advices too, maybe you have many experiences that i've never been through, and i learn something from what you said too. There must be a looottss of problems that we're going to face a head :haha: :haha: but oh well, we only could try to be a better person each day aren't we :haha: :haha:

Denna
YoFiend

Status:
Registered: Feb 25, 2009
Posts: 17474

Wed Oct 28, 2020 6:55 am
All what Rod wrote :thumbsup:

And few more things:

It took a lot of time, energy and some disappointments, to learn how to keep my expectations low. In fact, most of disappointments come from own expectations. Many friendships and relationships crush because one tries to change other one, or because one lost trust in other one. I have learned to choose careful and to trust my insticts. Most of the time, my first intuition was right, never mind how hard someone tried to fool me. I must admit, some fooled me, but hey, I learn every day more...

One of the biggest illusions is trying to be friends with everyone and to please everyone. Choose careful, choose smart.Trust your intuition. And don't worry if you made mistake and someone gambled away your kindness and trust. It's their karma, not yours. Just keep that on mind and it will be fine. :rose:

Lisa Jayne
YoRegular

Status:
Registered: Jun 26, 2009
Posts: 364

Thu Oct 29, 2020 1:11 pm
Sorry you're feeling low :hug:
you cannot please everyone all the time remember this! make your decisions based on you and how you feel.
I know I dont know you (dont know anyone in Yo if I'm honest!) but I have seen you around the forum and you seem like a wonderful person, very kind and caring. Just don't let people take advanage of that I hope you are feeling better soon :heart:
Anyone who makes you feel bad is not worth your time cut them off

Rayleigh
YoAficionado

Status:
Registered: Jul 05, 2009
Posts: 3296

Fri Oct 30, 2020 1:22 am
Denna (10205906) wrote:All what Rod wrote :thumbsup:

And few more things:

It took a lot of time, energy and some disappointments, to learn how to keep my expectations low. In fact, most of disappointments come from own expectations. Many friendships and relationships crush because one tries to change other one, or because one lost trust in other one. I have learned to choose careful and to trust my insticts. Most of the time, my first intuition was right, never mind how hard someone tried to fool me. I must admit, some fooled me, but hey, I learn every day more...

One of the biggest illusions is trying to be friends with everyone and to please everyone. Choose careful, choose smart.Trust your intuition. And don't worry if you made mistake and someone gambled away your kindness and trust. It's their karma, not yours. Just keep that on mind and it will be fine. :rose:



Lisa (106501765) wrote:Sorry you're feeling low :hug:
you cannot please everyone all the time remember this! make your decisions based on you and how you feel.
I know I dont know you (dont know anyone in Yo if I'm honest!) but I have seen you around the forum and you seem like a wonderful person, very kind and caring. Just don't let people take advanage of that I hope you are feeling better soon :heart:
Anyone who makes you feel bad is not worth your time cut them off


Thankyou so much both of you for the wonderful advices! :heart: Im sorry for the late reply! i really take a break for a while for few days already from yoworld :sad:

There is something that i learn when i read both if your advices and im really grateful for it! and im feeling better for a bit, and it's because all of your kind words and advices. What i can do right now is start to choose something wisely and trying to become a better person each day :hug: :rose: So thankyou so much all of you for your kindness, i hope you all also have a very wonderful day! and please stay safe :hug: :rose: :heart:

Mizz Libra
YoManiac

Status:
Registered: Nov 21, 2009
Posts: 43810

Sun Nov 01, 2020 9:15 am
I am sorry you are at a point of feeling this way, and can relate.
I don't enjoy letting other people down, and try not to.
At the same time the different people in my life all have different priorities, views etc.
Making one happy may make another one unhappy,and I surely also don't have unlimited amount of time and nerves.
So while somewhat trying I am realist enough to know it is impossible to please everyone.
It's not good to bend yourself to breaking point just to please everyone else. Do as much as you feel comfortable with.
Those who truly care will appreciate the effort that you do make, and the others it may be time to cut loose.

Rayleigh
YoAficionado

Status:
Registered: Jul 05, 2009
Posts: 3296

Sun Nov 01, 2020 12:48 pm
Mizz Libra (136290570) wrote:I am sorry you are at a point of feeling this way, and can relate.
I don't enjoy letting other people down, and try not to.
At the same time the different people in my life all have different priorities, views etc.
Making one happy may make another one unhappy,and I surely also don't have unlimited amount of time and nerves.
So while somewhat trying I am realist enough to know it is impossible to please everyone.
It's not good to bend yourself to breaking point just to please everyone else. Do as much as you feel comfortable with.
Those who truly care will appreciate the effort that you do make, and the others it may be time to cut loose.


I agree Mizz Libra, putting too much expectations to other sometimes just end up to let you down for somehow.. :'( :'( from now on, im trying not to put a high expectations to others to prevent this kind of things happen again.. and i hope we will face something like this more less by choosing the right and wise decision :sad: :sad: i hope you have a wonderful day Mizz Libra, and please stay safe too! :hug: :rose: :heart:

Cookie Monster
YoBeliever

Status:
Registered: Oct 30, 2008
Posts: 10665

Wed Nov 18, 2020 1:50 pm
I’m so sorry you’re feeling this way, but can totally see how. You’re very sweet and generous, much more generous than most, so right there, I would have guessed even without a post that you don’t get as much in return.

I wish I could say something helpful. I’m going through some of it irl, too, so it’s hard to see past it for either of us. You don’t deserve it, though. :hug:

Michaela
YoGroupie

Status:
Registered: Sep 20, 2009
Posts: 4496

Mon Dec 07, 2020 12:09 pm
I'm sorry to hear you are triggered life is hard and I totally agree with you, I always gift and talk to everyone regardless of how they act, you are a beautiful soul inside and out, you do you and whatever makes you happy. You can always message me if you want to talk. xx :heart:
477
478
478
479
479
480
482
482
483
486
499
500
500
500
500
500
500
500
500
500
500
500
500
500
500
500
500
500
500
500
500
500
500
500
500
500
500
500
500
500
500
500
500
500
500
500
500
500